The Catch Can
By Rick Eckart

TOP 10 BRISTOL HEADLINES
Tuesday August 28, 2007

10. When they said they were doing the "World's Largest Card Trick" at Bristol, everyone watched for someone to pull a giant Ace of Spades out of a huge deck while the other side of the speedway tried to guess what it was.

9. If you put a white, mushroom-shaped hat on Kurt Busch, and he wore his blue uniform, you could call him "Smurf" Busch.

8. Tattoo artists are lining up at California Motor Speedway in case Dale Earnhardt Jr announces his new number. In fact, they're lining up at all truck stops between Charlotte and California.

7. Denny Hamlin rarely has a DNF, but he got one at Bristol. He's so out of the loop, though, he thought DNF stood for "Denny Not Finish".

6. Sam Hornish will announce plans to announce plans about his NASCAR future in the near future. Said an illusive press release, "When that happens, we will all know exactly what will be happening."

5. Track owner Bruton Smith wants to add more seats to Bristol, but admits there isn't any room. "We may have to wait until they improve 'hovercraft' technology so we can add floating seat."

4. AT&T will be allowed to change its logo on Jeff Burton's car, but it will have to incorporate the following letters: "N-E-X-T-E-L"

3. With the announcement that Formula One champ Jacques Villeneuve may race NASCAR next year, it only leaves four drivers, worldwide, who aren't considering a Cup ride for 2008. They are believed to be the four "Yak Racers" in Kasey Kahne's Vitamin Water commercial.

2. Are they selling Dale Junior merchandise for half-price because he's halfway IN the Chase or halfway OUT?

…and the #1 headline from Bristol Motor Speedway…

1. "I thought I paid for more wrecks at Bristol with this here race ticket!"