The Catch Can
By Rick Eckart

The Bristol Swamp
Monday, March 17th, 2008

Keep both hands on the wheel and your brain in neutral, let's look in The Catch Can:

Rumor in the garage has Tony Stewart trying out for the lead role in the "Marlon Brando Story." That, or he's gonna be the "before" picture in the Subway commercial that shows Jared losing 245 lbs.

Darrell Waltrip's laryngitis was a rare treat for face fans. Or as they say, "the hens coming home to roost."

Dario Franchitti held a press conference to reveal that when they do a live-action movie of the TV show "Sesame Street", he will play the part of "Ernie".

Once again, Bobby Labonte and Kurt Busch are in danger of losing their points to a teammate outside the top-35. Said Busch, "Point-swapping is like wife-swapping, and I ain't in favor of neither."

The Sprint Cup testing session at Pocono Raceway is free for race ticket holders. The only thing they didn't publicize is where the heck that track is.

Dale Jarrett is retiring from competition this week. The last envelope he gets to deliver in the UPS truck is to himself. Something about needing to register for job placement assistance.

Jeff Gordon is on the cover of EA Sports "NASCAR 09" game. Half the fans think it's great, and the other half think it's okay, as long as he's got the black eye from hitting the wall in Las Vegas.

It turns out that Robby Gordon is not selling his race team after all. He is just selling race t-shirts to Alex Gillett.

Mike Wallace's daughter Chrissy Wallace may drive a Toyota in the Craftsman Truck Series at Martinsville, in the next generation of Wallace racers like cousin Steven Wallace. In comparisons of their driving style, Chrissy said, "Let's just say I'm hoping to restore the Wallace's good name."

Tony Stewart got the final word in his war with Goodyear. "I'll show Goodyear the meaning of the word 'slick' when I get my back waxed Monday for Victory Junction Gang."

...and the last drop in The Catch Can notes...

Because T-Mobile may buy Sprint-Nextel, expect the trophy to be called the "Tea Cup."